It was November
of 2011...I was a newby still - it was only the second time that I had
officially posted on my blog. I wrote on my experience of my son (then only 18
years old) having accidently hit his head and having a concussion. The
fear, anxiety, and frustration were all there in that post.
"He can’t remember and keeps asking questions from one minute to
the next….my heart aches for him in his frustration to remember. He starts to
panic…..I remind him to stay calm. Can we make it home before he loses it? We
do, but even then he can’t relax at home…..questions and more questions (yikes!
Will he be like this the next 2-3 days?) Please, Lord, bring back his memory!
...later on, I start to feel the release of my emotions from the stressful evening and
shed some tears! Oh, the things we endure as parents! We love, yet at such a
cost!!!"
As I read the post again, I almost had a feeling of de-ja-vu! Was that
experience a foretaste of what was to come....this time with my
mother, instead of my son? The only difference is that that was a temporary
memory loss and this time it is progressive and permanent. Same emotions,
same fears, different generation.
As a main caretaker, there are good days and
not-so-good days with my mom. Don't get me wrong. I love my mom more than
anything. But the repetitive questioning, childlike behavior, and inability for
her to process any deep thinking or decision-making can wear on my patience. I
definitely have realized my own need for the presence and patience thatonly God can provide. If, like me, you are one of the estimated 15
million Americans caring for someone with dementia, you know that it’s a
uniquely devastating disease. Dementia—the most common form is Alzheimer’s—robs
you of the person you love. It attacks memory, personality, language, and
physical abilities. It can last for years, even decades. And it has no cure.
I know that over time, my mom's dementia will only get progressively
worse. That is why I try to appreciate the good times that I have been blessed
to have to spend with her. Several months ago I made the choice to quit
my job and be one of the main caretakers of my mom for this very reason. Those
days and moments can be cut short at any time. I know that, even on those days
when it is more difficult to have patience and endurance, I try to keep
reminding myself that the days are short, compared to what time I may still
have with her. I pray for strength and am so thankful that I can go to theLord, Who...
...is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and He
helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise Him.(Psalm 28:7)
No matter what kinds of difficulties and trials
we may be going through in our lives, we can lean on our Lord to strengthen and
help us!! He provides all of our needs!! Praise Him!!
May you all have a blessed week!
You may find me linking up at any of the blog parties listed on the left sidebar.(or go to my blog party page link, below)
I actually feel like I have a number of stories... let me explain.
Everyone's story reveals not only where they have gone in his/her life, but defines much of who they are today. I believe that my "first" love story actually began before I got saved, but is one that continues on, even today. My "second" love story came later in life and it also continues to this day. Both are extremely important stories to me. I think it's important for each person to know their story and tell it, if only to one person. I love how this video, made by Chic-fil-A, depicts this.
So, I'm sharing those stories here, with you, today. This is part 3 of my series, called
As I shared in my last post, I was blessed to have been raised in a loving, Christian home. So, I had a great start in being introduced to who Jesus(my Savior) and God(the Father) are. I was a very shy and sensitive child. So, in one sense, I was very receptive to hearing about Jesus, yet in another sense, fearful and unsure about who I was. A few events in my life played a major role in this. The first of these was when I was about 5 years old. I was just starting kindergarten, when I had to have major surgery. I had, from birth, a kidney malformation, which caused some issues, which required the removal of half of one of my kidneys. I was hospitalized for about 2 weeks and have some pretty clear and vivid memories of that experience. The surgery was successful, but emotionally, it put me in a place of fear and loss of confidence. The second event that had a great influence on me was going into middle school. Being so shy, I made literally no friends. Of course, there were classmates and kids I talked to on the bus, but I truly had no friends to invite to my house or hang out with. I remember being very emotional at this time of my life...cried at the drop of a hat. (That may have been the reason I had no friends.) It was probably the hardest time in my life. It was also the time when all those wonderful changes and hormones were going crazy, so I was also overwhelmed and confused by those changes, too.(It didn't help that my parents, who were busy with two careers and two teenage boys to keep an eye on, never gave me 'the talk' or really let me feel comfortable to share with them what I was going through) Then, the summer between my freshman and sophomore year came, and it was a big one for me. I actually was approached by a new girl in my class(who was a friend of an old friend I knew from elementary school). She actually wanted to get to know me and hang out with me. It was a shock for me, but she pulled me out of my deep shyness. We spent a lot of time together that summer. I also got my first real job that summer, babysitting 2 young children, full-time. Before then, I really hadn't spent a lot of time reading the Bible or seeking God. But, one afternoon, while the kids were taking their naps, I opened up the Bible (out of pure boredom) and something I read must have touched my heart deeply. I don't even remember what verse it was, but I knew I had to turn my life over to Jesus. I remember praying for Him to come into my heart and life at the kitchen table of that house, where I was babysitting. Things really started happening, after that. Our family changed home churches and our new church's youth group were going on a huge week-long biking trip through Virginia and Shenandoah National Park. We road our bikes together(about 25-30 teens) through the mountains, ate camp food from a trailer that followed us, and slept in churches and Christian school buildings. It was awesome!! I think I bonded with other believers and gained some self-confidence that summer, too! In the fall of my sophomore year, I was baptized and felt the Holy Spirit fill my life. I slowly began coming out of my shell. High school was a great time, for me. I enjoyed good friendships and even though I was shy around the guys, through my friends, I was asked to the prom 3 years in a row. I never dated, though until I was a freshman in college. I chose a Christian college that was out of town, but close enough that I could go home to visit, if I got too homesick, which I did on a few occasions. During my college years, I would have to say my relationship with the Lord really ebbed and flowed, as well as did my dating life. I made some really unwise decisions in who I dated, mostly due to my low self-image at that time. I felt like if I wasn't dating someone, then something was wrong with me. So, my choice of suitors was not too strict. As long as they professed their belief in God, it didn't matter to me what they did or how they treated me. During that time, I did find myself seeking God, through a committed prayer life and some Bible classes that really made me think. Then, after graduating college, I decided to sign up for a short-term(1 year) missions assignment in Ohio. I worked as a teachers aide with deaf and hearing-impaired children in the public school system. It was a challenging experience, mostly due to living in a group home experience with 4 other short-term missionaries. We all had come from very different backgrounds and had completely polar-opposite personalities, and the adjustment was not easy. But, again, God used that experience to grow me in my faith. After that, I began gaining deeper walks in my faith, as I took different positions in the workforce...as a therapist, counselor, mentor, and administrator, all that pointed towards a walk of serving and loving others in Christ. Some of those positions again, were extremely challenging, especially emotionally, as I would step down from one job, only to be offered another. Yes, God always opens a window, whenever He closes a door. And my faith has grown so much over the years. I feel like my relationship with my Savior is secure, even though I still may waver in the strength of my faith, He is always there to pick me back up and I can count on that. I feel blessed beyond my imagination! No matter what may come into my life, He is always with me! He will carry me through till the end of my story! And I know that once my story ends, I will be with Him in Heaven forever!! What better ending to any story could I ever have?
My Other Stories To read all the different stories of my Love Chronicles, go HERE
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I hope this inspires you to also share YOUR story. If you have shared or decide to share it on your own blog, please let me know in the comments section. I would love to read it!! Thanks again for stopping by!! Have a blessed week ahead!!
In that post, I wrote about the love letters, shared between my grandparents during their courting days.
I feel so blessed to have been raised by two loving Christian parents, as well. My father, who was my grandparent's youngest son, lived down the street from my mother. (Yes, they were actually neighbors). Interestingly enough, they really didn't know or meet each other until my mom graduated from high school....that was because my father was 12 years her senior. He was graduating high school when she was just starting to go to school. By the time they met, he had accomplished a lot in his life already...college, going into the navy, and working for his father's furniture business.
Below is a photo of dad, when he was in the Navy. He is the one wearing the hat on the right.
The Furniture Mart, which was opened by my grandfather(standing on the right), and then run by my father(on the left) for over 50 years.
My parents were married in the little church, (pictured below), located just a few blocks from where they grew up. My mom told me that the picture of the wedding party was actually staged and taken after they were married. You can see people mingling in the background.
Nine months after they married, my oldest brother was born. 21 months after that, my other brother came along, followed by me, then my baby sister. It became a full house very quickly!
Our families on both sides were very close-knit. My parents built their first house on the same road they grew up on, and across the street from my paternal grandparents. Most weekends and holidays were spent at one or the other of my grandparents houses. Below: Grandpa and Grandma with me(on the right) and my siblings.
Over the years, my mom made sure we would get annual family photos. The first photo(below) was taken in our living room. (I remember the fake brick wall behind us.) The other 2 were taken in our back yard. My dad loved photography and took all these with a timer, I'm sure. For many years he also developed all his film in a darkroom he built in our basement. I love looking at these pictures and seeing all the changes in each of us in just a few years time. (Can you find me in each pic?)
I love the photo(below) of my parents from the 70's. They were so serious looking. I suppose raising 4 children on 2 middle-class incomes wasn't easy. My father ran the family furniture store and my mother had her own beauty shop, which she ran in the back of our house.
I can honestly say, even with all the chaos and activity, our house was filled with lots of love...especially the love of extended family. God surely gave me lots of great examples of His love through my family's time spent together, hearing and reading the Word of God, and attending church regularly.
"What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All
that we love deeply becomes a part of us."
Helen Keller
To read the other post in my series,
The Love Chronicles
For Part 1 - click HERE For Part 3 - click HERE Have a blessed day!
With
February being the month that contains Valentine's Day(and being that I just recently
celebrated my wedding anniversary) I have been thinking a lot about love....in
relationships and God's love for each of us.
As I
began looking through some old photos and albums, I realized that my parents
and their parents left me so many wonderful examples of what love truly is. In
the next 3 posts, I want to share my family heirloom of love…called
“The Love
Chronicles”.
A few
years ago, I was given a box, full of letters that my grandfather and grandmother
wrote, during their courtship. I decided to keep the memory of their love story
by putting their letters, that tell this story, in a book. I hope you enjoy
reading a few excerpts from the book below….
Below
is a Valentine’s Day postcard, from my grandmother to grandfather. Also enclosed
was a letter, written in French.
Bien, cheri (Well, darling)...I could not interpret most of this letter. Any French majors out there who can tell me anymore?
The letter below, shown on the original letterhead, was written by my grandfather to my
grandmother. He traveled quite a lot, especially to his homeland of
Michaudville, in Quebec, Canada. He often traveled by train by land and ship through
the Great Lakes.
For a
period before finally marrying my grandmother, grandfather lived in Fort Wayne, Indiana and in Canada.
Below are a few samples of the letters shared between them. My grandmother’s
letters are typed in red.
Even during their time of engagement, my grandparents related to each other as “wife” and ”hubby”. It's obvious in the letters below that my grandfather was a hopeless romantic. His words could make any woman swoon! (A true Frenchman!)
This
is a photo of my grandparents, later in life. They were married for almost 51 years,
till my grandfather passed away in 1972.
What a
great inheritance of love that my grandparents shared and now I can look back
on that love language through their letters. Of course, I realize that love is not the same as romance…but it definitely
helps to have the ability to write with a deep conviction and share what the heart knows and experiences. To read the rest of my series of The Love Chronicles
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