Finding Hope and Comfort, When Your'e Hurting or Confused

I desired relationship, not just with Jesus, but with my only son.

I prayed  

I shared  

I waited  

I gave thanks 

I put on the full armor of God; fought the enemy with the Lord's help!

I read God's promises over and over in His Word and claimed them for myself.

I waited again 

I tried to do everything right, and nothing seemed to happen...it confused me and if I’m being really honest it hurt my heart. 
I felt both of them drawing farther away, not closer to me.

What was I to do? What was I supposed to learn? Maybe it's this...

• Maybe welcoming God’s promises requires the same sort of acceptance we give any guest who arrives at our home: preparation, waiting, making room for the promise to have seat at the table, even as it’s still far off in the distance.
• Maybe sometimes God’s promises wait in the distance. Pain waits there too. That’s when He comes alongside. The presence of the living God, eagerly, but quietly drawing near to you in your hurting.
• Maybe I need to live a sincerely Listening Life. to listen until I understand.  He commands, "Be still, and know that I am God" (Psalm 46:10). "And to those whose minds are steadfastly fixed on Him, He gives the gift of peace."... 

I'm learning that when you are broken or alone or have questions and aches, good. It’s good to be desperate if you’re willing to be desperate enough to cry out to Him and let Him reach into the aching places and reveal you and heal you and speak to you.

When I feel desperate for my son in prayer, peace evades me. In a sense, I feel a deep concern for him. But, I do believe God put this in my heart...

Even Paul wrote "Apart from external things, there is the daily pressure on me of concern for all the churches. Who is weak without my being weak? Who is led into sin without my intense concern?" (2 Corinthians 11:28-29)

The statement here shows the depth of feeling of this great apostle; and shows what should be the feeling of every believer.

John Gills Exposition of the Bible states:

 "Now by all this which the apostle did and suffered, by all actions and sufferings, care and sympathy, he fully appeared to be a true and faithful minister of Christ, and abundantly more than the false apostles, who could produce none of these things as testimonies in their favour."

But, how can I have that intense concern and find peace?
The Holy Spirit is the Giver of  peace, and He dispenses it as a gift. Galatians 5:22 says one aspect of the fruit of the Spirit is peace. Notice that every promise Jesus made to His troubled disciples on the night before His death was rooted in the coming of the Holy Spirit. Christ promised life, full understanding, and peace to those who are His disciples, but it is the Spirit of God who takes the things of Christ and gives them to us. 

"Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful" (John 14:27). 

Jesus shows us His promise of peace. We ought to be able to lay hold of this peace. It is there, it is ours; but we must take hold of it. The peace He gives has to be received and applied in our lives.
He calls us to let the Lord's peace work in us. 

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts." Colossians 3:15 

As I  continue to pray for my son(and for a closer relationship) and wait, I'm learning that sometimes young men need time.  

"Growing in grace and wisdom and stature isn’t an immediate download — it happens the way a tree grows up: over many years. There’s a reason why children begin as seeds. It’s okay — it’s okay —- that growth and change take time — it’s supposed to. There are good young men out there who need to be unearthed from low expectations, and made over by relentless grace, who are given confidence to to do hard things by giving them hard things to do. 

Don’t quit now. There’s a whole generation of the hardest boys who can become the greatest men.There’s a whole generation of young men who will rise up if we raise our expectations, who can turn over new leaves because we never stop believing in them, who can do hard things because we never give up on them, no matter how hard it gets." ~ Ann Voskamp

Until then I am called to just be a pointing arrow — by the way I humbly sacrifice and serve: 

"The world needs the mothers and the gentle and the kind and the humble and the generously giving to get down on their knees and love enough to say exactly just that– through their words and hearts and serving, sacrificing hands. 

Focus more on living Truth than pointing out error, more on celebrating the beautiful than decrying all that’s broken — more on being a servant than on being right. That doesn’t mean we ignore concerns— it means our ultimate focus is on the commendable. Be a Light so lovely that he is drawn to the Source and warmth of it.

By this one white heart....Pure Love branded right into the prayers and the prodigals led back home." ~ Ann Voskamp 

In my spirit “I know God is going to bring my son back to Him.”

Now, Satan wants me to ask “And what if He doesn’t?” — what if He doesn’t do what we plea, what we pray, what we believe He can and will do and should do?

Even if He doesn’t – He does still love us.

If He doesn’t — I will still believe. Still believe — in Him. 

So, I continue to :   

>"Let your requests be made known to God, with    thanksgiving and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus”. (Philippians 4:6-7)  (Ask the Lord to have you feel as He would have you feel ...) 

>"If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord."(James 1:5-7)   

>When your heart and mind are troubled . . .Dwell on the hope and the promises found in Jesus Christ - for a harvest worth all of a mother's worn and faithful grace!

With A Little Hope . . .Finding hope in the unexpected places, in the circumstances that seem overwhelming, in the moments you question everything you ever knew. Scriptures of hope:

• "The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a humbled (contrite) spirit."(Psalm 34:18)
• "Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all."(Psalm 34:19)
•  "Know also that wisdom is like honey for you: If you find it, there is a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off."(Prov. 24;14)   
• "...we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us."(Romans 5:3-5) 
•  "....by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope."(Romans 15:13)

http://www.alphanewsdaily.com/FindingHope.html

He may not be answering our prayers yet, but He is working in us. He doesn’t always still our storms. But He can still us, in the storms. May the comforting Holy Spirit of God counsel and comfort us as we make our way through this broken world.

Rest In Me - A Song of Hope & Encouragement

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Man of Sorrows, Lamb of God

Easter will soon be here, once again!

For so many reasons, this is my favorite holiday. But it's also one of the most emotionally draining times of the whole year for me.

Let me explain:

Every year, the Easter story is(or should be) re-read and re-lived for all believers. It is not only a reminder of the great sacrifice Jesus made for us, but also the great promise of one day being re-united in eternity with Him. 

When I think of the pain, ridicule, and suffering he endured, my heart aches. What human being wouldn't feel empathy for any person who would have to endure such persecution!?!

Then, I'm reminded that He did it in place of what should have been my suffering and punishment! I deserve it, but He took it for me! Talk about feeling some guilt!!

Then, I realize how much He really loves me, to do that! And my mind cannot even fathom that kind of love! (the closest I could compare it to is the love I have for my own child). And I am overwhelmed by it!!

As I contemplate this love and sacrifice, I am full of gratitude...so full of thankfulness that mere words cannot express it! I can only weep over all I know about my Savior - who is also my Friend!

Then, finally, I end the experience of this holiday season full of joy and anticipation, for I know that He is risen and He lives!! And when it is time for the end of this life, I will live with Him forever in heaven!! Could we ever wish for anything more wonderful and joyous!!?!! (It has always perplexed me how anyone who truly hears and understands the story of Easter could reject such love and promise!)

I recently watched this video and song by Hillsong. What a magnificent overview of the Easter story and what it is all about! 

·         "Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows, yet we considered him stricken by God, smitten by him and afflicted. But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed." Isa 53:4-5

·         Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe in this?" John 11:25-26 

·         "Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, he cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over him. The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God. In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus." Romans 6:8-11 

·         "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, " 1 Peter 1:3-4

Over the next week and a half, may we think upon this horrific, yet wonderful event in history with much sadness, gratitude, joy, and anticipation!!

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Put on the Armor of God: The Battle is Real

I haven't posted for awhile, as I have spent a lot of time in contemplation, reading, and daily prayer. Believe it or not, my paths into these activities have not been easy. In fact, on some days they have seemed like pure hell. I guess I felt that posting these experiences each week would be more of a downer for you all to read, so I have put off writing.

Tonight, though, I have felt a tug to write about SOME of my experiences and how God has been faithful, in spite of the struggle that I have definitely felt.

What feels like an eternity, the past few months have been anything but joyful for me. In spite of this, I have really, really tried to stay upbeat and positive – reading Scipture and praying the promises of God. But, just when I think I have pulled out of the doldrums, something happens that pulls me back down again. At first, it would only be for a few hours or maybe as long as a day. Then I would pull out of it. Lately, the struggle is occurring more often, though. 

I recently have been learning a lot about the spiritual battle(angels and demons) that rages daily, often without our even realizing it. I started taking more of an interest in this, as I have had some conversations over the past 6 months or so with my son on the subject of “spiritualism”, of which he has taken quite an interest in. More so lately, as his girlfriend that he has been dating around the same amount of time, is into “new age” activities – ie. transcendental meditation, yoga, use of crystals, use of magic stones, and burning incense, etc. He has questioned the reality of demons and hell and we have had long discussions over these subjects with him, but he still does not seem convinced. Now, this has been quite disconcerting for my hubby and I, as he has been raised in a Christian home all of his life and had dedicated his life to Christ at a young age. We have always been very close to our son through the years, even though he took some very different paths in his education/career choices than what we would have wanted for him. Lately, he has begun to pull away from us – not returning emails, texts, or even phone calls. This has been especially difficult on me, as I often don’t know how to respond to this behavior.(Actually, neither does my hubby, but he just hides it better than me.) When I do finally talk to him, he is very upbeat and says he is doing great, but he also seems very, very distant and vague to share his thoughts or feelings(something he has always done with us in the past). When I question his non-sharing behavior, he becomes angry and defensive, even attacking me with his words.

So here I am, trying to figure this all out. And in the process, I’m realizing that a real spiritual battle is going on right before our eyes and ears. My hubby and I have agreed to take turns and pray together daily for the Lord to intervene and win this battle in our family. Now, I know Satan hates that and so it seems that he has been working overtime, attacking our family even more. My hubby and I have been arguing more and then because we cannot come to a compromise, end up not being as close as we should be. Yes, we still pray, but our prayers are very cerebral. I have felt a struggle within myself, as well. I want to fight this battle as a warrior of God, with the Lord as my Commander. Some days my faith is stronger, while on some I feel so very weak from the battle - leaving me feeling bloodied and scarred! But, I am also reminded and do believe that He carries me on those days! I know He hears our prayers and is in control. I try to stay positive and trust that He will overcome evil with good and open our son’s heart. Sometimes those demonic forces do get in and put doubts in my mind, though. Then, my emotions often become affected by my thoughts. It is a constant battle, causing me to be in constant prayer, as well as trying to stay as positive as I possibly can!!

Putting on the full armor of God is vital, so I read these verses EVERY day:

^"10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. ¹¹ Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. ¹² For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.¹³ Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. ¹⁴ Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, ¹⁵ and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. ¹⁶ In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. ¹⁷ Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”(Ephesians 6:10-17 NIV)

I want you to know that if you also feel like there is a battle going on in your family or in you personally, believe me, it really is real!!! This spiritual battle can seem overwhelming at times! That is why it is so important that we be ready and “in our battle uniform” at all times!! We need to never let up and never give up, as that is what Satan is waiting for!! Yes, we will grow weary at times. But, the Lord will take over when we feel we can’t fight and He will strengthen us once again for the days ahead!!! Stand firm, for the battle is His to win!!

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Just Not Up To Par

Don't know what the deal is lately, friends, but I just haven't had anything new to share here on my blog. So, I'm sharing a verse and will continue to add to my gratitude list for now.

Often wisdom invites us to ponder great questions. The question, “Can anyone make straight what God has made crooked?” echoes the words of 1:15—“Something crooked cannot be made straight.” Only God can determine what is and what is not. God makes our paths crooked or straight. And we often do not understand why one person’s way is straight and another’s is crooked. The message of the teacher is simple: reverence God regardless of 

the path you have been given to walk.(source)

"When times are good,

  enjoy them and be happy.

 When times are bad,

   think about this:

    God makes both good and bad times,

        so that no one really knows what is coming next."(Ecclesiastes 7:14, The Voice)

#1799 - Baking lots of yummy sweets while snowed in at home for 2 days... 

#1800 - Getting to see the movie "Risen" with the hubby and my mom. (Very emotionally moving and unique movie...)

#1801 - A flock of Canadian geese that stopped in front of our cottage for a short visit. 

#1802 - The wonderful variety of God's creation(enjoying the colorful and unique design of the birds He made.)

#1803 - Between the blizzard-filled, snowy days, a day(or even a few hours) of sunshine.

#1804 - My sweet doggie friends...Cheyenne

#1805 - and Jet

#1806 - For shelter and warmth on a cold blizzardy day.  

#1807 - That the Lord protected and kept me safe while I was travelling on the road in this weather.

May you all have a warm and blessed week!!

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Patience and Perseverance

Hello, bloggy friends!

How was your week? I experienced a few pleasant events, with some very difficult days in between. I think I'm finding this to be my perpetual answer to that question for several weeks, now. Even when there are a few positive times, these weeks can seem long and arduous. I'm guessing that is why the Bible has so many verses about being patient and persevering.(I was reminded of a post I wrote back in September of last year called "Prayer, Patience, and Perseverance" ) So, I apologize if it seems like I start to repeat myself in my posts. I think God has a reason for re-hashing the same subject into my heart and I feel led to post about it.

My week began with having some major dental work done (I spent 2 1/2 hours at the dentist on Monday). Of course, my mouth had been sore and quite sensitive all week. On Tuesday and Wedneday, we had major snowstorms that left roads icy and drifting snow across them. So, I was homebound for 2 days. Thursday and Friday I spent with my mother and visiting with a friend. Those were better days, even though I still struggled with ongoing back pain and hormonal issues. Saturday, the hubby and I stayed in most of the day, due to freezing temps, but went out to dinner and a (very dumb)movie later on. On Sunday, I wasn't feeling up to par, as my tooth was still causing me some discomfort. We did end up going out for a few hours, but stayed home most of the day. The best part of the week, my hubby cooked me a wonderful Valentine's Day breakfast in bed!! 

As I review the week, I know that there were times of pain and suffering, but there were also moments that I found joy and felt God's presence. A few of those times included me taking time with the Lord - when I wasn't feeling well or when the weather kept me inside - and I truly began enjoying time with Him, writing in my new prayer journal, reading the Word and some pages from books I have been reading... Oh, how God uses even those difficult, frustrating, and sometimes painful moments to draw us closer to Him! 

Maybe, like me, you can look back on the past week (or month, or even year.) and see the times of struggling, persevering, and patiently waiting to get through them, times that are not pleasant at all. But, in the process, God continues to fit into our lives moments, days, or even sometimes longer periods of time where we can see God's loving hand reaching down to help us, guide us, draw us to Him. Those are awesome moments!! We tend to pay less attention to them, but they are still there in our lives.

Here are just a few verses that really stuck out to me as reminders and encouragement that patience and perseverance are sometimes difficult, but always produce a positive result.

•  2 Peter 1:5-7 For this reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control,perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love.
• Romans 5:4 We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.
• James 1:12 God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.
• Luke 11:9  “And so I tell you, keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you."
• James 5:11 As you know, we count as blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of Job’s perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about. The Lord is full of compassion and mercy.
• Hebrews 12:1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.
• James 1:3-4 Because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
• Colossians 1:10-12 So that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God Being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience. And, giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his people in the kingdom of light.

It's been a few weeks since I last shared from my gratitude list. I wanted to share those here, as well.

#1791 - Continuing to pray with my hubby each night together. What a wonderful blessing!!

#1792 - starting to write in my prayer journal and loving it, as it also draws me closer to the Lord!(A few samples below)

 

#1793 - my mom - I love spending time with her, now that I am not working.

#1794 - the sun shining in the window on a cold, snowy day.

#1795 - an unexpected phone call from a friend, just to say 'hi' and that she was thinking of me.

#1796 - My (usually) romantic husband, who cooked a wonderful breakfast for me!

#1797 - God's amazing love for me!!(Thinking about the greatest love on Valentines Day.)

#1798 - My son, who has made me understand how to truly love (a mother's love) unconditionally!!

As we look to the Lord in the coming week for our strength, love, joy, and peace, always remember that we:

"should ask God, who gives to all generously and without reprimand, and it will be given to him." James 1:5

 

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