Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Overcoming Disappointment and My Brain of Mush!

Feeling disappointment is a part of life. Letting that disappointment control your attitude and behavior doesn't have to become the result.

It's been a week since I put my camera memory card into the little slot, closed the lid, and hit the 'on' button. The camera came on, but instead of the normal auto focus, the words "memory card error" shined across the screen. Attempt, after attempt brought the same result. No picture or videos; just errors and blank options.

"Great", I thought. " I didn't save my video clip."

I called a computer repair shop in town. "Well", said the techie, "those cards quite often have problems. That's why you're supposed to save your pictures and videos on the computer. There is a slight chance that I may be able to recover your stuff on the card, but it is a very slight chance. And your card will be ruined, once the attempt is made."

"Hey, I'm willing to try anything!" I retorted.
You see, the video I wanted was very special to me.

On December 24 of 2012, my hubby and I celebrated (a little late) our 25th wedding anniversary by renewing our vows on the beaches of South Carolina. We had a beautiful short ceremony and we got it all on video, to keep the event alive.  I was so excited the first time I watched the video, once we got home! It came out so clear and was well done! I was SO excited to show my friends and family what a sweet ceremony it was! It was about the most romantic 8 minutes of my life!

Then it was gone that quickly. The techie gave me little hope, but that was enough for me. So I left the card with him, in hopes of success. The next day he reported back to me that he found most of the photos on the card and even a few videos, but not the video of our renewal.

Oh, I was bummed! I went home and studied the ones he did recover. There was one video that still would not allow me to open it. I called the techie again and told him about it. In his "fix-it" determination, he worked on it again, trying another program.

A day later, he called me back. "I got the video clip!" he exclaimed. I was shocked and exhilarated all at once!! I made another trip to the repair shop, where he downloaded the video to my laptop, but first played a few seconds of the video to make sure it was what I wanted. "Yes" I exclaimed! "That's it!" I could not thank him enough!

Back home again, I went right to the video to watch the long-awaited 8-minute clip. The beginning seemed a little different than what I had remembered. It cut in and out, played for about 30 seconds, then abruptly ended. I tried again and again it didn't play all through.

My heart sank. "No! Not again!"
It appeared that, in reality, only a small amount of the video had been recovered. Not much to go on, for sure!

I was twice disappointed.  My emotions had been hijacked and thrown around so much in the last couple of days that I didn't know how to respond.
My stomach started to hurt.
"Why was this upsetting me so much?" I asked myself.
There were several photos that had been recovered. So I had at least SOMETHING.
I know I'm an emotional person by nature, but this was ridiculous!! 
What could I do to overcome my disappointment?

Asking the Right Question                      

After many years of hurts and frustration, I finally realized that the question I should ask God isn't "Why, Lord?" but rather, "What now, Lord?"

  • but it's hard to ask the right question when you’re feeling disappointed. It's hard to ask when your heart is breaking. It's hard to ask “What now?” when expectations and dreams have been shattered.
  • But your life will begin to change when you start asking God, "What would you have me do now, Lord? God is eager to show you what he wants you to do next.

Where to Take Your Heartaches

In the face of trouble, our natural tendency is not to ask the right question. Our natural tendency is to complain. Unfortunately, griping to other people rarely helps solve our problems. Instead, it tends to drive people away
  • But we can't just let it go. We need to pour our heart out to someone. Disappointment is too heavy a burden to bear. If we let disappointments pile up, they lead to discouragement. Too much discouragement leads to despair.
  • God listens. He'd rather have us empty our heart to him than keep that bitterness inside. He is not offended by our discontent. 
  •  God has the power to change us, our situation, or both. He knows all the facts and he knows the future. He knows exactly what needs to be done.

The Answer to 'What Now?'

When we pour out our hurt to God and find the courage to ask him, "What do you want me to do now, Lord?," we can expect him to answer.
  •  The Bible is such an important guidebook that we should immerse ourselves in it regularly.
  •  Seeking God's answer to "What now?" helps us grow in faith. Through experience, we learn that God is trustworthy. He can take our disappointments and work them for our good.

 No matter how painful your disappointment may be, God's answer to your question of "What now, Lord?" always begins with this simple command: "Trust me. Trust me."

I had to sit down and consider so many other things to counter-act my disappointment. I started writing all that God would have me learn/gain from this situation.
1. There are many things I can be thankful for...At least I had the photos. At least my hubby loves me enough to plan to renew vows with me. At least I can remember most of the ceremony and all that took place!
2. Maybe I am putting too much emphasis on romance in the relationship. Yes, some romance is a good thing, but it too loses its effect on us as time goes by. The reality is, romance is usually temporary, anyways. Love, though, is for eternity.
3. God is in control. If He wants me to have memories of this on video, He will provide a door to open that will provide it to me.

Along with this disappointment, January has proven to be a busy month, so far! We had several windows replaced in our house and my schedule has been anything but normal. Some days I feel like my brain is pure mush....a million things going in there and everything is in chaos. I take a deep breath when I start each day, saying a prayer that the Lord will get me though. I pray for peace, patience, joy, and trust in Him alone!

Resolved to Praise the Lord!
In 2012, I practiced writing out the gifts God placed in my life. In 2013, I want to continue that practice, no matter what God brings into my life. Some days, I may list gifts that are listed in the Joy Dare by Ann Voskamp. Other days, like today, I will write straight from my heart. I will continue counting from where I left off in my last post, where I listed my gifts.(Here)

Three gifts miraculous:
1,185 - My brother, coming home the first week of 2013, after being hospitalized for 3 months.
1,186 - Being able to go to South Carolina with my hubby and son to renew wedding vows on the beach.
1,187 -  Letting go of my disappointments and trusting God.

 Other gifts:
1,188 - A son who still enjoys spending time with his parents.
1,189 - Getting a little goofy....just for fun!
 1,190 - Walking the beach with our doggies.
 1,191- Enjoying a beautiful ocean view, with the sound of the waves coming in.
 1,192 - Unique artwork (graffiti) that my son liked.
 1,193 - A hug from my son at the beach.

 1,194 - My hubby relaxing with Sophie, watching t.v.

 1,195 - Historical grave-site in South Carolina
This man wore many hats in his day.

 1,196 - Back in Indiana...a quiet, snow-covered spot by the lake.
1,197 - A gorgeous pink sunrise on a cold winter morning.

Linking over at these blog parties:
Walk with Him Wednesday (A Holy Experience)
Winsome Wednesday(My Daily Walk in His Grace)


  1. Just stopping by from Tracy's link up. So fun to see your pictures--- LOVE the mustache one and the fact that your son is still up for getting goofy with his parents. What a gift! Of course, all those beach shots make me want to pack my bags and leave the cornfields of Iowa behind :) Thanks for the wisdom here- love the advice to ask, "NOW WHAT" instead of WHY ME.

    Blessings on your new year.

    1. So glad you could stop by, Alicia! Oh, I want to go back so much!! South Carolina is so beautiful!!!

  2. I'm sorry about your video. I can understand why you were so disappointed. Thank you for sharing all of this! You've listed such wonderful things to do in the midst of those emotions.

    1. Thanks, Mary. It's not been easy, but it has helped! I trying to look at what God has for me through all this!! Blessings, my friend!

  3. Disappointment...ahhh. I know the feeling. But you are right to say, "What now, Lord" rather than "why?" It takes discipline, but but I'm learning!

    Thanks for sharing your blessings and photos! Your son looks a lot like my son-in-law! What a blessing to spend such fun times with him and your hubby!

    Blessings, Joan


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