Monday, June 11, 2012

Five Love Languages

My ladies Bible study group is reading the book, "The Five Love Languages,' by Gary Chapman. This book has been around awhile, but I hadn't heard of it till a friend recently told me about it. So far, I'd give it two thumbs up. It's a great book not just for married couples, but for all relationships; from family members, to co-workers, to couples dating. Our pastor at church has also been talking about relationships and marriage, so we have been studying this subject a lot, lately.  I'm so thankful for a loving, caring, faithful husband. He takes care of me and my son, spends time with me, and shares my faith. We have been married for over 25 years, through good times and not so good times, but I wouldn't trade them for anything! They have made me and us together who we are today. They have strengthened our relationship and our walk with God. 

 From the book:

The 5 Love Languages®

What if you could say or do just the right thing guaranteed to make that special someone feel loved? The secret is learning the right love language! Millions of couples have learned the simple way to express their feelings and bring joy back into marriage: The 5 Love Languages, Dr. Gary Chapman’s New York Times bestseller!
  • Words of Affirmation
    Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.
  • Quality Time
    In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.
  • Receiving Gifts
    Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.
  • Acts of Service
    Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.
  • Physical Touch
    This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.
Sharing the blessings God has bestowed upon me as I take part in the Joy Dare.
3 gifts in what you are reading.
  "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman
776. Learning that my greatest love language and my hubby's are the same
777. Suggesting trying different love languages for my son/girlfriend's relationship and seeing improved communication.
778. Being reminded how we compliment each other and have learned to accept all of each others traits.
3 gifts empty
779. Thinking about being an 'empty-nester' in the near future...time goes by so quickly!!
780. "The man who knows his own emptiness can receive abundance of knowledge, and wisdom, and grace, from Christ; but he who glories in himself is not in a fit condition to receive anything from God." Source
781. The empty tomb!!
3 gifts that made you really smile.
782. Spending a day at the beach with my hubby!
783. Watching children playing in a water park.
784. Getting a kiss from my hubby!

A gift at 8, at 12, at 2
785. Quiet morning, walking through my garden.
786. My son, who just walked in the door, saying, 'hi, mom' ! :)
787. Going to a graduation open house...being reminded how our kids grow up SO fast.
3 gifts painted.
788. On terracotta pots: my first time using chalkboard paint.
789. Painted on 2 new teacups to match my teapot.
790. Son's girlfriend went with me to Pottery Bayou and also painted a coffee mug.
3 gifts full.
791. A weekend, full of activities and fun!
792. In spite of physical hardships, my heart is full, knowing God is my great Healer!!
793. Paul's prayer for the Ephesians, though they participated in "the fullness of Him who fills all in all" (Eph. 1:23), was that they might "be filled up to all the fullness of God" (Eph. 3:19), "to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ" (Eph. 4:13). Such is the basis of our consideration of the fullness of God in man. (source)


  1. My husband and I read that book last was eye opening!! We have different primary love languages but other secondary ones were the same. Every little bit of how to love your spouse better helps!

    1. Definitely, Alecia! It really makes sense, when you think about people's different personalities and even how we are raised differently.

  2. I really think this should be required reading for, well, everyone! My husband and I were introduced to it maybe 5 yrs ago, and it was quite encouraging for us. We had our 2 teenagers take the test and found it very helpful for them and in dealing with them. I'm glad you're enjoying the study, and I'm sure you will reap many rewards.

    1. I already have seen benefits of what the book suggests to do to speak other's languages. It opens so many doors! I can't believe I hadn't heard about the book before this! Thanks for leaving your encouraging comment!

  3. Thanks for sharing your take on the book. I read it several years ago and what I found very interesting is that a husband and a wife's love languages may not be the same! So often when we try to do something nice for our spouses, we do what WE would like...not what they would actually like! It helped me to understand the things that my husband needs and how to show him my love. I also recommend the book!

    Blessings, Joan

    1. So true, Joan! Thank you so much for stopping by! I always love to hear from you!

  4. Here in the Netherlands we read this book too. In Dutch of course. It helped me understand my husband. And my children.

  5. Looks like a wonderful book Ann. We can all use the insight.


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