Saturday, February 4, 2012

Barking Spiders and Other Funny Poems

A joyful heart is good medicine...

(Proverbs 17:22a)

 A 'real' spider from my garden.

Sometimes it's just fun (and good for us) to laugh a little bit! I found this children's author/poet  (CJ Heck) who writes some cute and fun poems specifically geared for kids. The title of two of her books have a specific theme that caught my attention. . . they're about 'barking spiders'. Have you ever heard about barking spiders? My first memory of hearing about them was through my dad. My father was always kind of a quiet, serious guy. Most of the time he was all business, probably because he had to raise a family of 4 kids on a home-owned and run business that wasn't the biggest success in our small town. He was a very hard worker, though. So when he mentioned to us kids that there were barking spiders nearby, that got our attention. We soon learned what it meant and would go running the opposite direction, as to not get a "whiff" of these invisible arachnids!

Barking Spiders
by CJ Heck
The barking spiders all march in
just past dinnertime.
Some big, some small, they come to call

 floating on the wind behind.

Each is clearly noticed,
although they can't be seen.
You're positive they're there though,
'cause your nose is very keen.

You know you can't outrun 'em
and a net won't get 'em caught.
Your friends laugh 'cause they're funny ...
Your mom yells 'cause they're not.

So open all the windows!
Crack the vents real fast!
'Cause these aren't normal spiders 

...barking spiders are just gas.

 Barking Spiders in Church
Those pesky barking spiders
followed me to church Sunday.
I tried to make them stay at home,
but they came anyway.

Then I did something naughty
'cause they were being bad.
When people turned and looked at me,
I pointed at my dad.

Here are some more funny poems this author wrote that I just thought were cute. . .

 Toe Jam
Can anybody tell me
what's that stuff between my toes?
My daddy says it's 'toe jam'
but I don't think he really knows.

It's icky and it's fuzzy
and I think I'll tell my dad ...
I wouldn't put it on MY bread
if it was the ONLY jam we had.

You know what makes me laugh
and puts me into stitches?
It's when I grab ahold and pull
the waist of someone's britches.

It’s fun.  It's called a WEDGIE
and what a super name,
just pull and yell out WEDGIE!
It‘s really the coolest game.

Hmmm ... who should I get,
lil sissy or my big brother?
Or maybe I should get my dad
but definitely NOT my mother!

And you NEVER do grandmas and grandpas.
To do that you‘d have to be nuts
('cause everyone knows that old people
don't even have any butts).

 Take some time to just laugh throughout your day! It's good medicine! (It's also cheaper and tastes better than most medicines.)


  1. I've never heard of the name barking spiders. And...I love the poem about joe jam!!!

  2. :^) now I wonder why they chose spiders? Patsy from


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