Tuesday, March 19, 2013

What's Your Pain Tolerance?

I went to my doctor the other day for a follow-up for my post knee surgery. For a few weeks my knee had been aching and causing me ongoing pain. It wasn't excruciating, but more just annoying and I found myself taking ibuprofen and icing it on a daily basis. When I told the doctor about my pain and asked what I could do to stop it, his response wasn't what I was hoping for. After reviewing my x-rays and notes from the surgery he said that I have a lot of arthritis in the area I had pain and that nothing more (other than knee replacement) could be done. He said every person's level of pain tolerance is different. He said he's seen much worse cases than mine, where the person had experienced very little to no pain. For some reason, what he said kind of hit me wrong, as I almost felt like he was saying, "Don't be a wimp!" 

 Because of my doctor's statement, I started to investigate pain tolerance and why some have more tolerance to pain than others.

Here are some things I discovered:
One looks to the brain to get to the root of pain tolerance. Research has been done that claims the source is:
genetic - The gene that metabolizes, or breaks down, the neurotransmitter dopamine delivers signals from one brain cell to another, and so can theoretically proliferate pain signals throughout the nervous system.
psychological - Pain can be manifested in negative emotions, such as anxiety, depression and anger, to name a few. Psychology accounts for aspects of tolerance that genetics cannot: “mind over matter.” There is a possibility that two people can tolerate the same amount of pain, but that one voices their felt pain more readily than someone else.
gender-based - Researchers have found that estrogen can act as a natural painkiller. Higher estrogen levels result in a higher pain tolerance. Though genetics and psychology may play a part, a woman’s pain tolerance is not constant, but is subject to manipulations by hormones.

Pain tolerance is an intricate neurological output. Not only is one’s basic threshold for pain determined by the presence of certain forms of a gene, but it can be pushed one way or the other by changes in hormone levels and one can condition him/herself to live and work through the pain.

It is widely believed that regular exposure to painful stimuli will increase pain tolerance – i.e. increase the ability of the individual to handle pain by becoming more conditioned to it. However, in some cases there is evidence to support the theory that – the greater exposure to pain will result in more painful future exposures. Source

 Basically, researchers are saying that those who live with more pain on a regular basis may actually be able to handle it better than those who only experience a little pain now and then.
 
So when someone (like my doctor) looks at me as if I'm weak for being in pain, I can look back at him with all the strength it takes to live with pain as my constant companion and ask, "Who here is stronger?"
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This all made me think about how God allows pain in our lives and how we can actually grow and become stronger Christians through living with pain.

In 2 Corinthians 1:3, Paul writes, "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort." 

God isn't "the Father of constant happiness and joy." Paul assumes life includes suffering and pain. 

Joy comes from having a God who cares for us and stays with us no matter what.

 

Bible Verses about Pain and Suffering

I found this list of verses that confirmed that God uses pain in our lives to draw us to Him:

  • "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when His glory is revealed." (1st Peter 4:12-13)
  • "He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." (Revelations 21:4)
  • "This suffering is all part of the work God has given you. Christ, who suffered for you, is your example. Follow in his steps." (1 Peter 2:21)
  • "Along with Paul, I stake my hope on resurrection, a time when Christ will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body." (Philippians 3:21)
  • "I can do everything through Him Who gives me strength!"  (Philippians 4:13)
  • "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 2:9)
  • "Yet I am always with you; You hold me by my right hand.  You guide me with Your counsel, and afterward You will take me into glory…My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."  (Psalm 73:23-24, 26)
  • "Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life." (John 9:3)
  • "Don't be afraid of the things which you are about to suffer. Behold, the devil is about to throw some of you into prison, that you may be tested; and you will have oppression for ten days. Be faithful to death, and I will give you the crown of life." (Revelations 2:10)
  • "Even though you meant harm to me, God meant it for good, to achieve his present end." (Genesis 50:20)
  • "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us." (Romans 8:18)
 http://chronicpain.wordpress.com/category/bible-verses/

But, then another question came to mind:  
Why does it seem that God is distant when we hurt the most?  
We question why we experience so much pain that we can't get free of.
           "How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
                How long will you hide your face from me?"
 (Psalm 13:1)

What are we to do with the pain in our lives, either physical or emotional? Especially those of us who have pain on a regular basis?

  • Knowing you are a child of God gives you the necessary preparations to follow His plan for your life. No matter what pain you experience, hold on to who God made you and look to Him for how to respond.
  1. First of all, see your doctor or a specialist. If there is a way to treat it, you need to try to get the help from those who are trained and qualified to treat the problem/symptoms.
  2. Ask, “How is my pain trying to define me?” Compare that label to who the Bible says Christians are, such as

This is what the Bible teaches.  It's the kind of persevering faith that the Bible heroes in Hebrews 11 lived out and that Christians today also live out.  We need the encouragement and teaching of Biblical heroes like these and the love of "Christ's ambassadors" (2 Corinthians 5:7) in the Body of Christ.  We need to depend upon our Good Shepherd who is with us in the valley of the shadow of death even when we don't feel Him.  Our Shepherd will leads us in the right path and provide us what we need.

  • Finally, determine and write down how you will respond to the painful experience. No matter how you feel, continue to seek God's peace and joy, and ask if it is His will, that He heals you (This delicate subject will be covered in a future post). If it's not His will, then pray that He gives you the strength and perseverance to be faithful and continue to seek Him.


I have many friends and family members that live in pain every day. This is not an easy road to go on. But, God never promised an easy life on this earth. The human body is intricate and can do many things, but it is also fallilble and mortal. From the day we are conceived, till the day we die, our bodies are destined for the grave. That is why, we ought to live every day to it's fullest, with a grateful heart, even when we suffer much!


 No matter what we experience, to God be the glory!~

Continuing in listing the blessings and gifts He has given me through the Joy Dare:
  
1,266 - Decorating for Easter/Spring.
1,267 - bbq pork chops
1,268 -A hard eucharisteo: texting with my son, who now lives 4 hours away.
1,269 - Buying spring bulbs...daffodils, crocus, tulips, and hyacinth.
1,270 - Being back in church, after being away for a couple of weeks.
1,271 - Going to the movies with my hubby.
1,272 -  Seeing a robin in my yard.


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Saturday, March 16, 2013

20 Years of Loud; A Week of Quiet

It's so easy to get used to a routine, isn't it? Even though we say we like some variety in  life, we also love the comfort and security of the familiar. 
 
No surprises or setbacks with the familiar. (Well, usually.)

For 20 years, it was the three of us. For 20 years, peace and quiet was a commodity, and privacy was non-existent.

From day one ~
there was crying and cooing...
laughing and singing...
cartoons blaring and  phones ringing...
family scrambling and sometimes, yelling...
guitars grinding and drums thumping (band practice at our house was a weekly event)...
car engines revving and many, many, many late nights, waiting up... 

...but it's been a week of quiet...well, mostly. 
My son moved out last Saturday (a four hour drive away). 
On Thursday he came back to town to pick up a friend and stopped in to pick up a few more things he forgot to take with him when he moved out. Of course, he stopped in at midnight (he's definitely on a different schedule, now)...yes, he called earlier to let us know he was coming. 

20 years may seem like a long time for some people, but for me, it went by in a flash! At one time I longed for the day I wouldn't ever have to worry (well, that won't ever happen.) and when my hubby and I would be able to enjoy an evening of peace and quiet.

Now that that day is here, the quietness can sometimes be so lonely! We actually talk about how we miss the familiar sounds and activity. We aren't bored or without things to do, but we got used to having that third person around...
to say to us, "I love you, mom." or "See ya tomorrow, dad."

When I go to the garage to get in my car to go to town, I walk by the stairs that go up to his room. I would always yell up, "I'm leaving Tyler. Bye. Love ya."  This week, I wanted to yell up the stairs still, but there wasn't anyone there to say goodbye to.

It's the familiar things that are hard to let go of. 

Yes, we have more privacy. I can go to the bathroom without closing the door, if I want. :) We can go somewhere for dinner, without wandering if Tyler would want to go or if he's planning on staying in for the evening.
 
 It's a whole different way of thinking for us. 

It's quieter....definitely quieter!

It's change. And we humans thrive more on familiar. So, it's an adjustment. It's the beginning of a different way of life. It's sad... yet happy, too. 
 
May you also have a quiet and enjoyable weekend!
"Now about your love for one another we do not need to write to you, for you yourselves have been taught by God to love each other. And in fact, you do love all of God’s family throughout Macedonia. Yet we urge you, brothers and sisters, to do so more and more, and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody." 
Heart Reflected



 


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Tuesday, March 12, 2013

"I Believe"


1 O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory above the heavens.
  2 Out of the mouth of babies and infants, you have established strength because of your foes, to still the enemy and the avenger.
3 When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place,
and the son of man that you care for him?

5 Yet you have made him a little lower than the heavenly beingsb and crowned him with glory and honor.
  6 You have given him dominion over the works of your hands; you have put all things under his feet,
  7 all sheep and oxen, and also the beasts of the field,
  8 the birds of the heavens, and the fish of the sea, whatever passes along the paths of the seas.


9 O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!
 Psalm 8
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How can anyone ever deny there is a God!? 
As for me, "I believe!"

Today, I am just worshiping the Lord for all He is, all He has created for our enjoyment, and His love for us, which is more than we could ever comprehend!!!

. . .since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.

Enjoy this Youtube music video I came across today! 
If possible, put it on 'full screen' and turn up the sound!
Giving God praise and glory, today.
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Sharing all the gifts He has shown and provided in my life! I am so VERY grateful!

1,258 - A heat wave for the Midwest in March!(68 degrees)
1,259 - Moving our son out
1,260 - Just a few drops of rain.
1,261 - Getting a nice hotel room at a discount.
1,262 - Trying out a sleep number bed in our room. (Very comfortable!)
1,263  -  My regular time with a friend, a cup of tea, and a cinnamon roll.
1,264 - A day without pain in my knee.
1,265 - Seeing an old friend, past co-worker, mentor, and counselor!


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Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Ten Ways to Love: #9 & 10: Forgive and Promise

This is the fifth post in a series I'm writing, called Ten Ways to Love. To read the other parts of the series go HERE.

 Here we are, on the last two ways to love others.
 I haven't posted in several days because, as it has been much of the time, it is quite busy around here. (So forgive me, as this will be a bit of  a longer post.)
We had been preparing for several weeks to help our 20 year-old son move out on his own to a town 4 hours away from ours. It's not been easy. This isn't only because of the long drive down or the process of house and job hunting. There's much more at stake here. 
Our son is a decent and caring young man. That is how we raised him. But, as all of us have in our lives, he's made many unwise choices already. Some are due to inexperience in life, while others are because of selfishness and the many temptations of this life that we are all bombarded with. It truly is a big, mean world out there! Some of his choices have cut us deeply, as parents.

For most parents who have teen or young adult children, you know what I'm talking about.
I was having coffee with a friend the other day whose children are now in their 30s and 40s. I asked her if the worry and hurt we feel when our children make bad choices in their lives ever goes away or changes. Her answer was, "It doesn't go away, but it does change. When you aren't right there to see every choice they make or every action in their lives, it isn't as difficult."  
In one sense, I look forward to that change. 
In another sense, I am sad, as a phase of my life as a parent is soon to be over.

I look back over the list of "Ten Ways to Love" and realize that, as a parent, I am already struggling with many of them.  When your child has lied to you, how do you learn to trust again? When they try to convince you of something by arguing, how do you answer without arguing back? When you've given everything you have to make their life better, how do you keep giving, in hopes that they will make good choices with what they've been given? Then there is praying, without ceasing! Oh, my! That is one area that has been an ongoing battle for me. I've prayed so much! And yet, much of the time I've felt alone in my prayers for my son. 
 Now, as I read the verses listed by the last two "Ways to Love", my heart shrivels with guilt. 

 #9 - Forgive without punishing
 "Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you."  Colossians 3:13

 We probably all have heard the saying, "I can forgive, but I'll never forget." I've said that many times before, myself. But what does that really mean? When I think of forgiveness in the Bible, I think that forgiveness not only involves a choice of the mind, but also a choice of the heart.
Psalm 103:12 says,
" as far as the east is from the west, so far does He remove our transgressions from us."
Isaiah 43:25 says,
 "I--yes, I alone--will blot out your sins for my own sake and will never think of them again.

If we say we forgive, but still keep in the back of our minds how that person hurt us, how can either one be healed? We need to do as Christ did, forgive, remove the transgression, and NEVER think of it again! Wow, this isn't easy!

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#10- Promise without forgetting
  "Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life."
Proverbs 13:12 (New Internation Version)
or
"The delay of what is anxiously hoped for, is very painful to the mind; obtaining it is very pleasant. But spiritual blessings are chiefly intended." 
  Proverbs 13:12 (Common English Bible)

We've all made promises before, promises to our spouses and promises to the Lord. We've made promises about raising our children in a godly home, at baby dedications at church. But, what about when they are grown and on their own? What kind of promises do we make then? And when we do make promises, do we put requirements on those promises. Like, "I promise to be there to support you emotionally and if needed, financially, as long as you make good choices in your life." It's so difficult, as a parent to let our kids mess up, especially if we know it will most likely affect the rest of thier lives (and ours). 
That is when trusting that God has our children's and our best interest in mind is vital, as He allows everything to happen in our lives. We may not be happy with many of the choices our children make, but we can be assured that:
 "in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."
(Romans 8:28)

Continuing to add to my list of  'gifts', as I continue in the Joy Dare.

1,250 - So many reminders that the Lord has shown me that He cares and love me and those I love, too!

1,251 - As I go through different stages of my life I realize that He truly has been there all along.
1,252 - A son, who desires to do good and make wise choices in life.

1,253 - The love of a family.
1,254 - Time together, enjoying each other's company!

1,255 - Knowing in my heart that the Lord loves and continually watches over our children at every stage of life.

1,256 - Anticipating the adventures to come, as God lays out His blessings in our lives.
 The apartment building our son will be staying in.

1,257 -  The many changes in weather.(As I relate it to the many changes life brings.) We are having, yet, another snowstorm this week. 
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Everything is Blooming!!

Well, if it wasn't evident in my last post, it’s definitely very evident this time around!! Spring has sprung!!! We’ve been keeping so ...