2023: New Year. New WORDS, New Theme

 Hello all! Is it really 2023??? 

Well, COVID is at least unofficially over!! Praise God!! The past 2 years seemed to creep by, with the world fully engaged in the pandemic. My mom has continued to go downhill mentally and physically, but she is still with us. Over the past few years there have been some physical and emotional illnesses that continue to plague family members. There have been joyous occasions...like the birth of our great grandson! We have done some traveling, but not as much as I would have liked.

But, probably the most difficult part of that time for me has been, even after things started to open back up, that I was still doing a lot of things the same, day in and day out. Still visiting mom on a regular basis, making sure her health needs were met (still always a work in progress, as staff shortages continue in the nursing homes). Also, trying to know how to address some of the health issues at home. Praying continuously for healing over those who are suffering! But not seeing much change. Waiting patiently for years, but also trying endlessly to make the changes that are needed, when possible!(Which seemed rare to me) Many days, I have felt at the end of my rope, exhausted, and ready to give up! Of course, I am still here, so I always have found even the smallest bit of strength(only through the Lord!) to keep going.

With all that being said, I want to have a more positive outlook in 2023! So, I have once again been motivated to have a word to get me going....actually, I have prayed and felt that there are 3 words that have come to mind. 

CHANGE

                         MOVE 

                                                  MIRACLE

                                                                                                  

With my chosen words of the year I also seek God for a verse to go along with it. 

With them all pulled together, I feel like God is saying, He is going to do something great in my life the coming year. Isaiah 43:19 really seemed the most appropriate!

 "See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland."

This year, I also have found a quote that really hit home for me...

As we continue into the year, I will be posting different ways that I feel God wants me to use these words, verse, and quote. I will be sharing some goals and hopes for the year. I also will look for ways that God provides and opens the doors to allow for change, moves, and miracles in my life.

Stay tuned for those posts....I promise I will be working harder at posting more often!!!! 

Blessings to you all in 2023!!!

TIME STOOD STILL - ONE AND A HALF YEARS LATER(I'M STILL HERE)

 

WOW!! Has it really been one and a half years since I've posted here on my blog page? 

I guess I do have a pretty good excuse for not posting, though. Uhhhh, right....COVID, the state of our country and our world, mom taking a turn for the worse with her dementia, selling mom's house, family issues. In reality, they ARE excuses, but I think they are good ones. Don't you?

Anyways, I'm back.(For now)

Don't ask how I decided to come back...well, you can, but I won't go into detail. Basically, I was looking back on some past posts and realized that life has a way of grabbing you by the b&##$ and not letting go. 

Life is such a contradiction of time, a polarity of feelings and experiences! 

I feel like the past year and a half just stood still, I have no clue where it went. So much has changed...and yet, it hasn't. Sometimes, I SO WANT it to change. Other times, I don't.

I am acutely aware of how fast time has passed – how fast it is passing – and as much as I look forward to moving on, I am intentionally breathing in the moments I have with my mom and my son. I realize that when things do change(and they eventually will), those things will most definitely NOT be what I would like to change. Mom will pass on someday. Tyler will move on in his life, as well.(He is still currently living at home and working...saving money to travel the country on his own, like we have done.)  It feels like I'm in a straight jacket and heading down a rabbit hole all at the same time. 

Talk about conflict!!

Me and my hubby's(mostly me) dream of traveling the country in our RV have been put on hold over the past 18 months. Not that we haven't done anything. We've taken a few 1-2 weeks trips, which have been awesome. But, nothing like our first trip after Ken retired. And, don't get me wrong. He's on board with traveling, too. He's just more "content" with sticking around home than I am. 

I am also reminded that time is always passing, always changing us, always changing those we love even when it seems like it has stopped.  Even when it feels like we are in a holding pattern,  the reality is that time is always passing.  Holding patterns don’t exist.  Every moment has purpose and is fleeting.  Time may seem to stand still, but it is moving. Always moving.

I need to remind myself to breathe it in! To enjoy these days(even the rough ones), as they will come to an end. And, even though it may not seem like it now, I'll move on to the next journey in my life. The next step...the next move. This moment, these stressful times, will be history. 

I am working at being grateful for these times. I also look forward to the changes that will come, in their own time. I am trying to do both at the same time, which can be a balance act....not taking one or the other too seriously. Not trying to HOLD ONTO one or RUSH the other. 

The Lord has it all in HIS plan and timing. I need to allow Him to direct me each and every day. I need to keep reading His word and praying for direction. I need to lean into Him when things get difficult. I need to wait on Him to close the doors that will need to be closed and open new ones when it is time to open them. I think this theme blends so well into what I wrote in my last post from 2020...(you can read it HERE). As the old saying goes, 

"Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow is not here yet. We have only TODAY!!"

I also had decided again NOT to have chosen a word for 2021(or any year to come). My last word was for 2019, which was "fearless". Boy, did that one kick me in the butt!! I carried it over to 2020, but it never was a word I cherished. I think I've come to believe that God keeps changing what things He wants us to work on  throughout every single year of our lives. It's a continual journey. 

Anyways, I AM still here. Hopefully I'll check back in more often with new posts. I do want to remember these days that seem to currently "stand still". One day, they will be just a memory.

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens."(Ecclesiastes 3:1)

Blessings to you all, my friends!!!

Burn The Ships

The beginning of a New Year often has us looking back and seeing how God has walked with us in the past and contemplating the year ahead. 

We tend to want to hold on to the familiar, the easier path, the old ways....but these often become unhealthy, and even dangerous for us to continue down some paths/have relationships with some people in our lives. When we become aware of these different paths/people in our lives that can hinder/harm us, we may need to "rise from the dust and walk away". 

"Burning the Ships" can be SO difficult(maybe even excruciating.) 

I don't know about you, but FEAR often has kept me from burning the ships and moving ahead. Fear of rejection, fear of what others will think, fear of being alone, fear of not knowing the future. But, God reminds us that He will never leave us, nor forsake us. He is our source of strength. And He holds the future and will take care of us!!

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” ~ Joshua 1:9

This song came to my mind, as I've been thinking about some past relationships/choices(mainly family) that I have held onto, but have come to understand, have not been healthy,

Burning the Ships also means giving God control of things I don't have control of. The song below, also came to mind.

I pray, Lord, let me know when something/someone is pulling me down/away from Your will and plan for my life. Let me have the strength and courage to give it to You and know that if it's Your will to re-connect, You will open those doors again. If not, let me walk away, 'Step into a New Day', and know that You have purposed this for me and You have my back!! Let me surrender to You everything that I have no control over.

 I love You above all else, Lord!! Amen

"Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." 

Philippians 3:13-14

Fearless in the New Year

A REVIEW OF 2019:

January - Celebrating mom's 82nd birthday

February - Catching up with an old high school friend!!

March/April -Traveling South and West U.S.
 Meeting my online Texas friends!!

Biking around the rim of the Grand Canyon 

Canyonlands, Utah

May - Spending Quality Time With Mom
Taking mom out for our weekly meal!

Taking mom fishing

June - Walk for Alzheimer's Awareness/Fundraiser

Danny Gokey/Tenth Ave North concert

July - Family kayak outing

August - Lazy lake days

Bonfires by the lake

Days of endless fishing

September - Camping in Colorado

Many fun-filled days with mom

October - Dressing doggies up and Trick-or-Treating downtown

November - Thanksgiving meal with mom

December - Playing games; Celebrating the Holiday together

Attending a Christmas Program 

Christmas Dinner

My word for 2018 was CHANGE and there definitely was lots of change this past year. Change in our family relationships, change in our plans for the future, change in our responsibilities, and more than anything, change in my self-confidence and how I deal with difficult circumstances!  

A new year, a new decade, is now in front of me! How much more will God be teaching me, guiding me, growing me? Honestly, I know, no matter what, God walks with me, so I have nothing to fear! As I continue to learn what it means to be fearless, I pray I can look to the Word of God for the answer!!

Quotes from Fearless Living in Troubled Times: Finding Hope in the Promise of Christ's Return by Michael Youssef

"Satan wants to distract us from the task at hand. He wants us to focus our attention on the past—on past hurts, past failures, past regrets—because he knows that if we are focused on the past, we will be immobilized in the here and now. Or he wants us to focus our attention on the future—on worries and fears that may never come to pass, or on wishful thinking that never accomplishes anything."   

"In times of persecution and oppression, hope endures. Hope perseveres. Hope brings us peace in the midst of trouble. The serene and confident expectation of the return of Jesus Christ, whether his return takes place in the next instant or ten thousand years from now, fills us with a peace that no persecutor can take away."  

"Only in the Cross of Christ will we receive power when we are powerless. We will find strength when we are weak. We will experience hope when our situation is hopeless. Only in the Cross is there peace for our troubled hearts."

Things to remember:

Render Onto Caesar What Is Caesar's

In my last post, I shared a word I felt God was calling me to claim for 2020.

2019 is not over, but I'm already seeing how the Lord is preparing me for the upcoming year and my faith is being greatly challenged. I keep hearing my new word in Scripture, in devotionals, in songs, and in prayers. My word is

FEARLESS

As Christians, we are warned many times in the Bible that we may endure persecutions and hardships of many kinds. We are also told over and over, "Do not be afraid", "Do not fear", and "Fear not."

• Deuteronomy 31:8 “He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”
• Isaiah 43:1 “Don’t fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine.”
• Isaiah 41:10 "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
• Matthew 10:31 "Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows."

Jesus was continually put in "sensitive" situations with the people surrounding him. Many people tried to use their authority and power to trick him, blame him, and revile him, but he always stood his ground and was ready to respond to their questions and badgering. In the book of Matthew, twice in a row the local so-called religious leaders tried to attack him...

Matthew 22:15-21, 34-46

"Then the Pharisees went out and laid plans to trap him(Jesus) in his words. They sent their disciples to him along with the Herodians."

“Teacher,” they said, “we know that you are a man of integrity and that you teach the way of God in accordance with the TRUTH.  You aren’t swayed by others, because you pay no attention to who they are." 

"Tell us then, what is your opinion? Is it right to pay the imperial tax to Caesar or not?”

"But Jesus, knowing their evil intent, said, “You hypocrites, why are you trying to trap me? Show me the coin used for paying the tax.” 

They brought him a denarius, and he asked them, 

“Whose image is this? And whose inscription?”

 “Caesar’s,” they replied.

"Then he said to them, “RENDER TO CAESAR WHAT IS CAESAR’S, AND TO GOD WHAT IS GOD’S.”

"And when the Pharisees heard that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees, they themselves gathered together. One of them, an expert in the law, tested Him with a question: “Teacher, which commandment is the greatest in the Law?”

Jesus declared, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

While the Pharisees were assembled, Jesus questioned them: “What do you think about the Christ? Whose son is He?”

"David’s,” they answered.

Jesus said to them, “How then does David in the Spirit call Him Lord? For he says:

‘The Lord said to my Lord 

        “Sit at My right hand until I put Your enemies under Your 

         feet.”’ 

So if David calls Him Lord, how can He be 

         David’s son?”

"No one was able to answer a word, and from that day on no one dared to question Him any further."

The Pharisees and Herodians wanted to entangle Jesus over the issue of taxes. If Jesus says they ought to pay, he betrays the Jews who resented the Romans. If he says do not pay, he would be in trouble with Caesar and the Romans. Either conflict could undo him and his influence. The malice in the question springs from envy. Even Pilot knew the Jews were handing Jesus over out of envy. (Matthew 27:18) Caesar’s(the government) influence and our allegiance to them are shaped by God’s superior possession and authority. We render to Caesar(government) the things that are Caesar’s(governments)  as an act of worship to God. (Ephesians 5:22; 6:7) If we don't pay taxes, we are sinning against God.

Jesus’ answer of the greatest commandment is another model of how theological discussion should proceed. The command to love the Lord God with one’s whole heart, soul, and strength was simply a quotation from Deuteronomy 6:5. No man was able to answer him a word,.... They saw the dilemma they were reduced to, either to acknowledge the deity of the Messiah(the truth), or confess their ignorance(and their guilt); and neither of them they cared to do, and therefore judged it to be the 

WISEST TO BE SILENT!!.

Jesus, having confounded the great sects of the Jews, proceeds, in his turn, to propose to them a question for their solution. This was done, not for the purpose of vain conceit and triumph, but:

1.to show them how ignorant(and accountable) they were of their prophecies.

2.to humble them in view of their ignorance. They were wrongly confident in their ability trick and scare Jesus into submission.

3.to bring to their attention the true doctrine respecting the Messiah - his being possessed of a character superior to that of David, the most mighty king of Israel - being his Lord, at the same time that he was his descendant. 

https://www.desiringgod.org/messages/obey-the-government-for-gods-sake

What a perfect example of how we should address those who come against us, who try to do injustices in the name of "righteousness" and their own made up "laws". We are not to fear, but trust in God's protection and His truth to prevail.

"Do not be afraid of what you are about to suffer. I tell you, {the devil will test you}, and you will suffer persecution. Be faithful, even to the point of death, and I will give you life as your victor’s crown." Revelation 2:10

We are called to be fearless in the sight of evil man's attacks because God is for righteousness and justice! He will not let the righteous be forsaken.(Psalm 37:25)

Instead of fear, we are to turn our hearts and minds to the Lord in prayer. We are to fully trust Him to carry us through. We are also called to love and pray for our enemies...

 "But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you," Matthew 5:44

So, today and every day I am saying a prayer....May the Lord also lead you to pray for those who you come across each day in your life. 

Until next time, may you be
...strong and courageous. Deuteronomy 31:6 
in the Lord and in His mighty power. (Ephesians 6:10)

I've Been In An Endurance Race

Yep! You read the blog title right...I've been in a race!!(Not literally, but figuratively and spiritually.)

I've been quiet here on my blog for quite awhile, but for good reason. It's taken lots of stamina, time, and patience for me to take each step over the past 11 months!!(Just as a reminder: I had shared back in January of this year that My Word for 2019: was ENDURE ) And my endurance continues to be vital, as I continue to run this race with love and commitment in the upcoming year!!

Endurance implies that whatever  is happening is going to take a long time."  Well, it definitely has been and is what I have experienced in the past year.

"To endure is more than just continuing to exist; it is continuing to exist in the same manner as before the suffering began. To “endure” does not mean simply to grin and bear it. Christians will feel sad, betrayed, or even angry at times. These emotions in and of themselves are not bad; they only become sin when we allow them to take root in our lives and produce bitterness, evil thoughts of revenge, or unforgiveness. Believers must remember that everything that comes into our lives is under the control of a sovereign God who has promised, 

"He is working all things out for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28). 

Christians can find hope to endure when we consider the rewards God has promised us. 

“Do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised."(Hebrews 10:35)

and

 "By your endurance you will gain your lives."(Luke 21:19)

https://www.gotquestions.org/endure-hardship.html


As I contemplate what God wants me to learn in 2020...WOW! Another decade into the 21st century is almost here!!...I am already picking up that the Lord is leading me to stretch my wings! I have felt Him drawing me to a new "word" for the coming year. It's definitely not an easy word for me to accept. It is one that continually pushes me outside my comfort zone!! I'll be sharing more about it in the next few months. But, here is a (really good) clue in the song below!!!

My New Word for 2020

Until next time, may you be

"... strengthened with all power according to His glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience," (Colossian 1:11)

My Word for 2019: ENDURE

Now that we've entered a new year, I have been contemplating what my word and verse should be. Several different words have come to mind...marathon, fortitude, patience, persevere, resolve, resignation, forbearance.... but the one word I finally chose was endure. Two verses are the sources for what I base my word on: 

 "...and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,," ~ Hebrews 12:2 

"being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great ENDURANCE and patience", ~ Colossians 1:11

In my youth, I excelled in sports that required being fast...and sprinting. In track, I ran the 400 meter dash. In softball, I ran the bases faster than any of my teammates. I've also been one to be more interested in getting things done over doing them slowly and more precisely. I've always hated anything that required long, drawn-out activities. I get tired, impatient, and bored easily.  

Of course, God has a way of strengthening us in our weaknesses by allowing us to endure through different experiences. And I definitely have experienced having to "endure" waiting for many things in my life. Recently, I went on a weight loss journey, and was determined to lose 50 lbs in 6 months. Of course, that journey has taken much longer and, even though I have lost 35 lbs, I'm still working on  the last 15 a year later. I think this journey will continue through the rest of my life. I have also struggled with the disappointment of not meeting my goals on my schedule. I've  struggled with waiting for God's timing for me to be able to travel with my hubby, following his retirement. But most difficult for me has been waiting for the Lord to open my son's heart and invite Him into his life. So, needless to say having "endurance" is what I feel God is trying to teach me about every day!

When I think of endurance and what it means:

Endurance is the power to withstand something challenging. If you decide to run a marathon, you will need lots of endurance to run many miles.(source)

Endurance involves our mind and heart, or the way we react to hardships. A person who endures manifests courage, steadfastness, and patience. Endurance is “the spirit which can bear things, not simply with resignation, but with blazing hope and keeps a man on his feet with his face to the wind. It is the virtue which can transmute the hardest trial into glory ” Endurance  can also be used when discussing an exhausting mental situation or stressful time — the endurance to bounce back! (Source)

I know most all of us have felt like giving up at one time or another. I've prayed many prayers over the years. I've waited patiently for God to answer those prayers. Some, He has answered. Most of them, though, I'm still waiting for His answer. Even though it's not been easy(and many times I've wanted to give up). The strength to patiently endure only comes through the power of the Holy Spirit in us!  It is only through Him that I could have endured over the years in many areas of my life. 

caregiving for my mom for 3 years

waiting to travel in our RV

Waiting for the bond of a shared faith with our son.

“The Christian life is not a 100-meter dash but a marathon. Those who lack patience, endurance and discipline will drop out of the race.” 

–Randy Alcorn, 90 Days of God’s Goodness

Endurance builds character and integrity in us. Scripture speaks of this process of character development: 

“And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another” (2 Cor. 3:18). 

"The life of endurance requires us doing many hard things and often suffering. But these hard things are the very ones that bring purpose, joy, and satisfaction to our lives." (Source)

I've learned that when you hope for something, it seldom occurs as you expect. I must not let my level of satisfaction and accomplishing my goals depend on people who may or may not have direct impact on what I do or how I do it. Often I find myself either feeling disappointed or stressed that something hasn't happened yet or that others who have made promises to me haven't followed through with them.  But, I'm learning that I cannot let other people make choices about my life. 

“Don’t let the expectations and opinions of other people affect your decisions. It’s your life, not theirs. Do what matters most to you; do what makes you feel alive and happy. Don’t let the expectations and ideas of others limit who you are. If you let others tell you who you are, you are living their reality — not yours. There is more to life than pleasing people. There is much more to life than following others’ prescribed path. There is so much more to life than what you experience right now. You need to decide who you are for yourself. Become a whole being. Adventure.” ― Roy T. Bennett

When I start to feel unsure of myself, aimless, or can’t find anything  that makes me lose myself, I have to remember that I need to always turn to Jesus who is the "Author and Finisher of my faith". I should not depend on anyone else, but only God, to come through for me. 

This isn't easy to do. When we make a decision that goes against what others expect of us, we usually will be choosing an uncomfortable and even painful journey. Sometimes, the burden will be so enormous that we will have three options every step of the way: give up, give in, or give it all we’ve got. I hope I will be able to choose the latter. Becoming a more resolute person will require me to dig deep and find the will to overcome any obstacles in my path. I cannot change outside circumstances, so I must change my response to the events. Going against the current is tough. When you start doing something different, you’re pointing out where other people are going wrong — so they may get angry and defend why they do what they do.

I know that all I can do is continue to be hopeful and persistent that He will answer in His timing. As I continue to wait, I also must resolve myself to accept this moment and to appreciate that my present circumstances are just as important my future experiences. I need to appreciate and be thankful for all He has done, in spite of what I have to endure. Ways that may help me through this would be to write down my goals everyday, focus on the task I wish to accomplish, and maintain my resolve even when times get hard. If I see something in my life isn’t working, I must be willing to change it up and be flexible, or be willing to embrace my conditions, and to be kind to myself and know that building resolve is a work in progress. 

“Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart.” ― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

What is meant to be invites me to let go of the mental struggle that opposes the natural flow of life's events. Life proceeds, regardless of your resistance to it.

"The Christian life is not a sprint ... it is a marathon. Training for one is far different from the rigors of preparing for the other." 

--Emily Schankweiler; A Sacrifice of Praise] 

“Jesus has called you to run a race. It’s a faith race. It’s long-distance and multi-terrain.”Jon Bloom

Other encouraging verses to help us to endure in our lives: 

• "But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.” (2 Chronicles 15:7)
• So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified. (1 Cor. 9:26-27)
• forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead. (Philippians 3:13)
• “For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God, you may receive what was promised” (Hebrews 10:36)
• “Let endurance complete its work, so that you may be complete and sound in all respects, not lacking in anything.”​ (James 1:4)
• "Don’t waver in resolve. Don’t fear. Don’t hesitate. Don’t panic. God, your God, is right there with you.” (Deuteronomy 20:3)
• "Strengthen your resolve and do what must be done." (2 Samuel 2:7a)